An Open Letter to Architecture Headhunters

 Directors of Human Resources, Firm Principals, Vice-Presidents, and Headhunters:

This madness must stop.

While I am flattered with your many offers of employment and attention, this insanity must cease. I have told you all time and time again that I will consider your offers IN THE ORDER I RECEIVED THEM and will get back to you all in as timely a manner as possible. But this constant violation of my personal life in your pursuit of me will get you nowhere.

In the past 48 hours, I have received no less then four edible arrangements of a dozen chocolate dipped strawberries bearing offers of employment, twelve courier delivered invitations (with attached plane tickets), and a singing telegram from Foster & Partners.

Not to mention the dozens of firm principals lining outside my door trying to make an appointment. It was like a global AIA convention on my front lawn, and the neighbours were complaining. I'm just an architecture student, for crying out loud, and not even graduated.

And you, HOK, sending the venerable Mr. Obata to my door with the keys to the company Lexus, that was just low. I felt terrible about sending him away empty handed.

It's just a summer internship, so I really don't see why so many of you felt the need to create new divisions within your offices for me to head up. And while changing the firm name to Alec, Skidmore, Owings, and Merrill would indeed be "ASOM (awesome!)" as you cleverly pointed out in your offer, I'm not sure its a prudent decision based on my summer employment timeframe.

And can someone please tell Shigeru Ban to take down whatever he is building in my driveway with the cardboard tubes? Maybe Mr. Ito, while you are here, you can tell him, because my Japanese is terrible.

Please stop calling. I've changed my phone number and set up a new email address. There's not enough parking here as it is, so the gift cars you keep sending are becoming really problematic, and it's really irritating.

If you really want me in your offices to design for you, respect my privacy and give me some space. I will keep your information on file, and if something changes, I will get back to you.

In the meanwhile, leave me alone.

Sincerely,
Alec Perkins, LEED AP